Monthly Archives: May 2015
Sometimes people will say something and it astounds you, because of the realization of how much something in you changed, yet you’re able to relate because you felt that not too long ago.
At some point in our lives, I think we all heard expressions that urge us to say what we mean and mean what we say.
But how consciously do we really choose our words in our day to day interactions?
Or are we mostly operating on the auto-pilot, like so many things – driving to work and barely remembering how we got there, sort of in a gaze, we say familiar phrases whether they really reflect how we feel or not. In US we’re big on the small talk, chatter, chatter, chatter, anything to fill the space sometimes with unnecessary fluff, as if it’s somehow unacceptable to have any silence whatsoever, anything to make things “comfortable”. Often times I find this overbearing and uncomfortable.
Today, I want to discuss the word hate.
In the dictionary it is described as an intense or passionate dislike. But if it’s a dislike, why just not say “I don’t like it”. I think it’s more than that. More than people realize. When you say that you hate something, you’re putting out an aggressive energy. You can dislike something, but be indifferent about it, that way you’re not wasting your energy or promoting a feeling of aggression within yourself.
There is already enough of that in the world.
I just wanted to touch on this subject, because I don’t think many people are saying it with a full awareness, not realizing just what their words mean.
I’ve spend a lot of my younger years trying to contain so much anger, even rage that’s developed from many years of hard life and abuse growing up. Hate used to live in my vocabulary, I used to write “fuck the world” in my diaries, I hated my own reflection because it reminded me of all the pain I’ve carried.
I hated authority, dress codes, cheerful people, paperwork, the system, mindless jobs, alarm clocks, holidays, fake smiles, suits and anything that made me think of the word “normal”. I was consumed with hate, I hated my life and everything in it.
I tried to escape it any way I could.
A lot of years of soul searching have passed by and I thank the Universe for still being alive, surviving all the shit I’ve been through, for being the person I am today and I am most grateful that hate doesn’t live in my heart or my speech anymore.
So, maybe it will offer you a little bit of a different perspective. Maybe one day you’ll say it out of habit and catch yourself doing it and really think whether you really hate summer or fish or whatever else you may express your dislike in.
You know, it feels so much more amazing when you start focusing on the things you love ♥ Read the rest of this entry